Monthly Archives: May 2015

As I Have grown Older, I’ve Learned That Pleasing Everyone Is Impossible, But Pissing Everyone Off is A Piece Of Cake.

Turns out that Ash is a wanted man. Because of his bogus Internet scam, he made the F.B.I.’s ten most wanted list. I suppose congratulations are in order. Apparently his Free The Children Of Umonia con has raked in quite … Continue reading

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SELF LOVE “If God Had Intended Us Not To Masturbate, He Would Have Made Our Arms Shorter.” ~George Carlin

“It has been a dream of mine since childhood to own and run an amusement ride,” he confided. “I never knew you to be such a romantic Miro, I am genuinely touched.” I chuckled to myself. “But not just any … Continue reading

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Good Health Is Merely The Slowest Possible Rate At Which One Can Die.

The phone rang exactly 3 times before he picked up. “ Ivan, bonjour mon ‘ami. How are things in sunny Karpland?” Again no matter what time or day, the fact that Miro always answers the phone never ceases to amaze … Continue reading

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In The 60’s People Took Acid To Make The world Weird. Now The World Is Weird, And People Take Prozac To Make It Normal.

 I can’t sleep ever since the Ash fiasco my anxiety level is through the roof. No amount of alcohol or drugs can calm my nerves. I continue to get the transfusion that is now U-Buzz, which consists of Aaron’s formula … Continue reading

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Quote From Abraham-Hicks Publications…

“Gender identity” is inconsequential from an Energy standpoint. In other words, when we view anything that is physical, we see the Energy of it, and we note that the Energy of what you call male and female is equal in … Continue reading

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An Apple A Day Keeps Anyone Away If You Throw It Hard Enough

 Petropolis Ludwigshafen is well on its way. The factory is just about finished and we are now accepting applications for the assembly line and resumes for managerial positions. Our product as you know is U-Buzz, because you thought growing old … Continue reading

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If History Repeats Itself, I’m So Getting A Dinosaur…

The babies have arrived. We now have triplets. As predicted they all have their brains floating above their heads. I suppose this is a new part of the umon evolution. Aaron is working on a way to stuff their brains … Continue reading

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